Imagination

I dream I’m touching your body;

I imagine I am near you.

Almost all the time;

But I guess that’s just my imagination and I guess that’s what every girl wants.

And imagination can be cruel

But cannot be dealt with….
It is the imaginings, the rambling of a young girl for you to think you’d want me too.

Star-Crossed Lovers

We were just two lost stars that happened to find eachother by accident.

Maybe it was fate that separated us

But I know we could have showed the world something other than ugliness 

The two of us could have touched eachother 

Maybe you could’ve been something to me,

But as we got older time took us apart

Soon we had turned into shooting stars;

Lost in the galaxy 

But we could never pass this way again….

For we were only star-crossed.

Fate would never allow us to be together for the night sky was endless and stars could never touch eachother as the moon looked on.

For you see; we are just shooting stars with different paths.

And sometimes the stars are blind.

So maybe when everything’s at peace 

We can be together and finally touch eachother’s hearts 

Someday when everything is safe 

Indigenous

They weren’t much like the blonde girl next door, but they were beautiful nonetheless. Some would call them chink, gook, Japs, yellow and sometimes cross-eyed. As for islanders they were called barbaric; lethal; threats; guineas.

They weren’t much like the blonde girl next door, but they were beautiful nonetheless. They weren’t yellow; they were beautiful like porcelain.

They weren’t much like the blonde girl next door, but they were beautiful nonetheless. They weren’t cross-eyed not chink. They were the shape of almonds and they had a fine piercing stare; but they smiled with happiness in their eyes.

 

They weren’t Americans but they are a people who tolerate and have their happiness with what little they have.

 

An oppressed racial group; they have suffered from the death of their cultures and left all they can’t leave behind.

 

Thus, it is the colonizer.

 

They weren’t black and they weren’t white.

 

Barbaric is a word used for cannibalism.

 

They had sleek brown skin and were considered Asian by their counterparts.

 

Lethal? Once a peaceful people now fighters in army combat. Now they are lethal.

 

Threats? Aren’t we the ones threatening them the most? Leave the war with thee Americans. But as a spiritual people, we become uncomplacent.

 

Is this really what the spirits want for us?

 

Guineas. Grease balls. Old names of the 1960’s.

 

Now Italian-American….

 

What people want are to be known as indigenous.

 

What people in big countries take on are their smaller counterparts.

 

But why? 

 

POWER Because without power there is 

COWARDICE and the smaller counerparts help us by winning their wars under their

FEAR….

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thinkin Bout you

I’ll be dreaming about you tomorrow and almost every night.

I will be probably somewhere East by the time you get to read this and propose to me

And I will probably be married for God’s sakes and

I’ll be seeing nothing but darkness when I close my eyes in my lonely room, but deep down you know that somehow I’ll be seeing you.

But only in my dreams,

I’ll be thinkin’ bout you.

My Great Perhaps

There was so much more to that.
What I saw in you….
I see different worlds of the sun in your eyes….
You….
You are my moon.
you are my greatest possibility
my great perhaps.
Now I know what it means by having these subtle great possibilities;
This could have meant I could have been with you.
Perhaps I will keep wishing for you and spend my life just wishing.
Wishing of the great perhaps of us.
You make up all my stars and my constellations.
and I’m so glad I have you….
But things cannot last forever and not everything stays gold….

Shooting Stars

I’ll be seeing you someday in my future 

Missing you 

Loving you

Cherishing you

You’re my shooting star.

I could only wish to be with you;

Yet you’re so far away

and I cannot reach you 

I’ll be the one to love you

No matter

No matter how ugly you get whatsoever 

I love you

I love you

I do…..

Without A Trace

“Not another love story.” He sighed into her chest.

“This is certainly not a love story.” She said while typing.

“I was in the prime of my life. Certainly the time when I was ripe of age. But no darling….. this is certainly not another love story. I was ready to love but I couldn’t even begin to start about why I was so weakened and my heart and soul wearying of love. You see dear heart. My heart was breaking. Because you shall hear me off again after she comes running into your arms. I will never love again. For shame on my heart if I should walk from you. Because you had walked out on me.”

“Where will I find you?” He asked.

“Among the stars.” I whispered gently.

Before I could tell him goodbye,

I had awoken from a deep sleep, but I found him looking at me with the saddest eyes.

Without him knowing that I was prepared to leave.

Without a trace.

La Credo

I will not go quietly into that fair night 

As long as I know there is a God incarnate and a devil behind me.

Lo I fare in the land of darkness and all that will hurt me,

I shall fear no evil

For god is my rock and my shadow.

 

Lo though I walk in the valley of the shadow of death I shall fear no evil

For the lorde is my rock and my sword….

Sweet Surrender

The softness of your body; naked on my lips lingers into the next morning
as my fingertips caress your hips like the morning fog kisses the dew.
My clothes slowly slip off like butter on my sweating body.
I shudder as you kiss my forehead and shiver as you caress my limbs;
your forehead now on par with mine as you kiss my lips down to my breasts.

I gasp with my heart in my throat as your cologne drives my head spinning once you delve deeply between my legs and plunge there plummeting me into the sweetest surrender.

Cheap Thrills and Cherry Lips

 He’s the type of boy who you can have.

A boy who liked girls who liked cheap thrills.

A boy who was growing into a man.

The kind of man who was sweeter than most people.

He’d give you roses if you weren’t happy.

He’d hold your hand when the weather was going through a rainy day.

***

She was the type of girl who understood monsters.

Who craved them on her sweet cherry lips

Who kissed them for the way they operated.

He craved her

She did not crave him….

Although he’d try his best to save her;

She was a lunatic.

She was crazy and she loved monsters;

So they left her one.

She was never one though for cheap thrills 
She had to get the thrill of being…
She had wanted to feel

And she loved him instead of the boy she could have had because she thought that that he could make her feel with cheap thrills and cherry lips.

Purity

The boy with the mysterious eyes gave me purity in the form of roses. He was sweeter than most people. 

He had kindness in his eyes and a heart…. thank you

I don’t need them at all

But I love them anyway.

He has kind eyes and the kind of graceful smile you’ll only see in people who love art and simplicity.

Can’t Stop The Moonlight

What is so romantic about the moon?

Is it that when the moonlight hits the clouds, 

It tends to disappear against the pitch black of the night?

It is the moon. 

And it is I.

We are alone 

and I am thinking of you.

And I cannot help but think

I can’t stop the moonlight from hitting the clouds.

It’s almost funny how a few months to a year can change the moonlit nights 

Porcelain

He was a porcelain doll
Something I couldn’t touch,
Something I wanted to cradle in my heart and in my hands.
I couldn’t bare to touch him
To leave my mark on my doll of porcelain…..

Your Body

You and I were so terribly sure of eachother….

How could I live to love a man so violently fierce and overprotective?

I love you and you I will be kissing until forever

as the sun beats down on the rays that caress your skin

holding you in your silent sighs and silhouettes….

the rain after the sun beating down upon you

kisses you as your sweat beads down to your tasty lips.

you go into the shallowest part of the seas as the seawater hugs your hips

and melts you into its waters.

Yes, you are the sun the moon and all my stars that make up this constellation of the piercing black night…. after the sun and rain and the wind caress your disheveled hair.

all I wanna do is love your body….

right.

Scattered

You reminded me of music and you reminded me about how to tolerate you when you hurt me

Cause you knew that I couldn’t 

And it’s funny cause you knew what was to come,

But knowing you; 

You wrecked the meaning of happy endings 

And you tore apart my heart,

Shattered my soul

And left my mind scattered

The Childhood Friend

We weren’t little anymore….

He was my best childhood friend until he left.

I saw him again and I thought I could have the chance to tell him I love him;

But no.

He left me;

To cry

The Silence

When he was gone;

Sometimes silence was always better.

But with that kind of face; he could make me smile ten times more than my sadness.

And sometimes; sometimes he made me feel like there was something more than being empty;

Than being alone all the time.

He could make me laugh my fears away,

But as I was laughing; I couldn’t see that I was falling down some dark cliff

Because he left me feeling cold

With my heart in my throat;

And flowers in my hair

I jumped and I fell hard with my broken heart.

Forevers

It was the way everyone wanted to fall in love. Love at first sight. But we were two inseparable people with many difficulties in our stars. Our love was not like most lovers’. It was a falling comet of colliding stars and although dead, it held meaning because for me babe; it made a universe of forevers. 

Shucks

I miss what was never mine.

I wanted what I could never have.

And shucks!

I wish i was your lover.

And damn!

I wish I had you.

I wish for what I could be

I wished I could be with you

I wished for you 

Hell and Back

I have gone through hell and back trying to tell you I love you

But in all I’ve done,

I no longer love you that way

Because I can’t love you like that cause you wouldn’t let me.

My Shining Star

You are my sun and my moon.
You light up the night sky.
I’m amazed by your strength and courage.
You’re my veteran.
You’re my shining star.

Angel Boy

I love you

You’re my angel boy

On a jet fighter 

I love the way your muscles tense up when you’re around me;

The way your arms flex..

I love the way you sniff my hair every Monday of the week.

I’m going to miss you for the rest of my life when you leave to some far away place while I wait for you to come back home to me; to safety.

I love you

You’re my angel boy 

On a jet fighter 

My Soldier

When you fuck me

Our bodies pulse in between with heat

As I pulse around you.

Loving you;

Enjoying you.

I enjoy you.

Come home to me in one piece and reassure me that you’ll be safe and that you’ll return to love me when you get back from being my soldier 

Before You Go

The smell of your scent on my pillow is a breeze where you’re so far away.

The touch of your lips on mine is like kissing a God.

You love me roughly as you push and pull me on my bed.

You leave quietly without warning.

I wait for you to come home in one piece and that is our love story as you stroke and caress my body on yours.

Love me 

Fuck me harder 

Before

You

Go

Come home to me 

Come back 

Crowley

Dead men can’t tell through dead man’s eyes….

Cause in dead man they see nothing….

Aleister Crowley was a famous magician. He held many secrets. They say he lived at the Louisiana bayou but for some reason, people kept disappearing. They say the dark knight of the soul  finally came and got him.

As for me, I was thee survivor out of all of them.

There is a feast where the good people of the good place go. It is far and the journey is long.

Crowley used to say it straight to my face.

***

I was once in love. I was his moon he’d tell me.

Alfred was a god fearing man and he saw what he saw. It is what it is. 

Back in the backyard basement, we kept a statue of Behemoth and my father was a pastor. Always preaching the word of God’s gospels.

One fateful day, he became a lunatic. Enraged by not my father or God. He worshipped my father and the gospel of God so much that he decided to make an occultist nation with me. My name was Helena Rothschild and soon we were gonna be the bayou’s bests.

He had a wife and cheated on her. One day he beat her to death and whiplashed her in the head. He then took her blood from her forehead and saith “This is the true and final blood of Behemoth.” He then sacrificed his wife with her knife and told me to join him using the words “us.”

***

Alfred had a niece. Everyday they would chop wood for a fire. He loved her so much that one day Alfred decided not to send her to his barn. 

***

She had also blindly worshipped Behemoth through her uncle’s teachings and they both together had learned to be something. Always filling the chalice with blood. 

My name is Alice. Alice Cobbler. I’ve never believed it was Magick. Pure, raw untamed magick. But my uncle, he believed he loved truly only the demon. Now only the demon in the backyard.

That was when I saw the bodies. Some bruised with no eyes and some cut up and bloodied. Some with cut fingers. 

There lay his wife, Genevieve. He breasts were leaking blood at their tips. My uncle would chop the fellowship up if they ever got too friendly with him. He was only a magician and soon I knew I would be dead too. Because dead men tell no tales but they don’t tell lies either only cause of their marks on their bodies.

I was in love with one of the police officers. His name was Tommy Tucker. He was a spy. Always knocking on my door an’ givin me apple pies.

They started to rot and soon my uncle got caught in a fight and they arrested him and told me he was going to the good place.

Tommy looked at me; the love of my life. He looked at me like Jesus to a child and told me straight. 

“Don’t say anything. Stay dead. Dead men can’t tell through dead man’s eyes….

Cause in dead man they see nothing….”

“Tommy? Marry me. Won’t ya?”

He looked at me. 

“ I’m married honey. I couldn’t marry you even if I tried.”

He turned to the car. He gave me his phone number and a gun. It was a pistol and it was blackened; old but polished.

“If you decide to be; kill the right ones kid.”

He then shooed me away.

Soon I didn’t tell anyone anything about it.

I was the walking plague of sickness.

A sociopath with no boundaries and I kept coming into wards and they taught me to shoot it. I was now educated as an army brat and soon I became dead man.

No one knew me. No one saw me.

 

And I stood there. As dead man. 

Soon I became a lesbian lover. They called me the greatest lover because I took care of all my girlfriends.

Then later on, I found a letter

“Welcome to the good place.

Join our fellowship 

And learn to worship with God.

Aleister Crowley.”

I almost had a heart attack as I grabbed the phone and called the police immediately.

Keep on Marching

Echoes of your boots down the hallway are now a memory of my past

And I believe that someday you’ll never come home to me but to her.

And that my love;

Is all I’ll ever need in this life.

To assure myself that you’re coming home alive as you fly your jet fighter.

The bombs getting close and close to the bad moon.

Please stay home

Stay with me.

Love me 

Love me like you used to.

***

As the bombs come flying through the air faster than the speed of cars,

Come home to me.

And keep on marching.

Keep on marching.

And come home to me….

Summer to Winter

I think of you in my daydreams and in my heart.

What is left of the time spent with you are subtle Mondays and sometimes you’re the one who defeats my monsters of the pit of my hells.

You set the room on fire 

And when you leave you leave the frost to come over my heart and my head.

You’re my only soldier.

I want you home.

Where I would wait for you to come home everyday

The Room

In the subtlety of my lonely room,

Despite the dark corners of my closet.

I think of you most although it’s been a year

I carefully wait for you 

To come back to me.

To come back home.

I get frustrated and sometimes I blame it on myself for letting you go so quietly; so quickly.

I think of you from time to time and I cannot help but wonder 

What do you dream about in the darkness of your dreams….

Where are your thoughts lying in while you’re without me?

Come home to safety 

Come home for me.

You can’t be everybody’s soldier.

Be mine….

Mine.

Jealousy

I’m jealous of the way your comb brushes through your hair.

I’m jealous of the way the water hugs your hips as the sun kisses your body.

I’m jealous of the way your uniform looks so good comforting you while you wear it.

But I hate those boots.

Because I will be home praying everyday that you will return to me in one piece.

Is it no surprise?

I’m in love with you.

I’m just really jealous; of the way you hold her to your chest,

I’m jealous of the way you look at her,

I’m jealous of the way you touch her.

I’m jealous of the way she touches you.

For all I know, she could’ve been me.

But I am jealous Schroeder.

I’m jealous of the way you could just fuck her;

And sniff her hair.